Do I ever shut up about bedtime and sleep? No.

Do I ever shut up about bedtime and sleep? No.

Sometimes bedtime is a happy magical rose-tinted time of cuddles and tickles and stories and sleepy sighs and love-yous and good-nights etc and all is right with the world.

But sometimes…

Sometimes…

it

is

not.

Amongst the things Niko was freaking out about tonight was that his water was not cold enough. We keep a lidded/sippy cup of water near his bed that he can drink through the night. He’s been dry over nights basically forever (since LONG before he was potty trained, what’s UP with THAT?) so liquids near/during/after bedtime have never been an issue for us. But today he made me refill that fucker with “clean clear cold fresh” water three times and it was never cold enough. “This still tastes like warm water!” So I filled it with ice from a novelty crab ice cube tray while the cold water was running to get as cold as possible, then topped it off. THIS ALARMED HIM. Because it was ICE and he didn’t not WANT ICE because ICE IS (apparently) TERRIFYING especially when it is MON-MON (crab shaped, no idea why he calls crabs mon-mons) SHAPED what was I trying to do, KILL HIM? Later I managed to get him into pyjamas and he got upset because I 1) didn’t help him take off his shirt and then 2) helped him take his shirt off. Then I offered him short pyjama pants instead of long pyjama pants WHAT WAS I THINKING (other than it being in the 80s)? Also I called him sunshine which, he was furiously quick to remind me, is NOT his NAME.

In the course of the night he pulled my pants down off of my body, exposing my bottom to anyone who might have been passing by. He was sobbing in incoherent rage when he did that, but also started laughing because LOL BUTTS so was sobbing and laughing and coughing and just… a mess.

Poor kid.

(it was pretty funny)

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